What I have to share today is primarily directed toward those who are already trying to be good people, to love their family and friends, and to walk in the light of God’s love; and yet, are plagued by a profound lack of peace and harmony in their lives; and are trying to understand why.
In doing so, I want to make it clear that although I comprehend the truths and ideals I am about to share, I still have yet to master them. And so, as always, my main intended audience is myself.
As I ponder and pray about these things, I write what the Lord reveals on the subject, to be had for study and remembrance, both for myself and others in future times.
Perhaps the greatest perplexity I face in my life is the question of why I continue to sin.
Why do I know one thing to be just and true, and yet sometimes do something else entirely?
Why do I know the light, and still choose darkness when I am feeling miserable and weak?
In short, why do I and others like me continue to sin?
One famous songwriter explained why in this way: “There’ll be times when my crimes will seem almost unforgivable. I give in to sin, because you have to make this life livable…” (Strange Love, Depeche Mode)
And so, the world (and those of the world) teach and promote sin with the excuse that it is somehow necessary. But this is a lie. This is a dishonest rationalization. This is a lame excuse. This is legitimizing impropriety. Sin is never necessary, just as impropriety is never good.
We do not sin because we really think it is necessary, but because we have decided that at that moment it is what we want most. But in so doing we have cancelled out the one thing that truly leads to real and lasting happiness, which is doing what is best and what is right, according to our conscience.
One ancient prophet explained it this way:
“Do not suppose… that ye shall be restored from sin to happiness. Behold, I say unto you, wickedness never was happiness. …all men that are in a state of nature, or I would say, in a carnal state, are in the gall of bitterness and in the bonds of iniquity; they are without God in the world, and they have gone contrary to the nature of God; therefore, they are in a state contrary to the nature of happiness.” (Book of Mormon | Alma 41:10 – 11)
The nature of God is what brings real and lasting happiness. It is becoming and being like Him.
God teaches and demonstrates to us how to become aligned with the nature of happiness. We are aligned with the nature of happiness by learning and incorporating in ourselves the character and attributes of Christ. We must learn what He knows, think how He thinks, feel how He feels, say what He says, and do as He does. This is the way. To do this is to live in harmony with the nature of happiness.
On the other hand, the world teaches that sin and momentary pleasure is the way of happiness, or at least, relief from misery.
And so, each of us needs to decide who we will believe and then live accordingly.
Sin is the result of being convinced that the quick and easy solution, the short-cut, is the best option. But this too is a lie. It is a deception. The best solution for suffering is never based only on consideration of the best short-term solution. The best solution for suffering must consider both short-term and long-term consequences. Easy shortcut solutions invariably result in greater long-term suffering.
It is the nature of evil to disregard long-term thinking in favor of immediate, short-term gratification. But deep down, we all know this is dishonest and evil because it demands a price nobody wants to pay—nor should they! And so, by living this way we become filled with dread and guilt. And so that dread, guilt, and promise of vengeance screams within our souls, consuming our minds and hearts with an accursed fire that is unquenchable.
In the movie, John Wick I, the great villain and antagonist, Viggo Tarasov, a truly wicked man, knew this and spoke of this when he explained to John the errors in his thinking and judgement when he (John) tried to leave the cult of the High Table:
Viggo: “And then you left. And the way you got out, lying to yourself that the past held no sway over the future. But in the end, a lot of us are rewarded for our misdeeds, which is why God took your wife and unleashed you upon me. This life follows you. It clings to you, infecting everyone who comes close to you. We are cursed, you and I.”
John: “On that we agree.”
Justice haunts the wicked but gives hope to the righteous.
The righteous do nothing but good because they are focused on the results. And this fills them with hope!
Whereas the wicked sin because the lies of Satan destroy the hope they should have in righteousness.
And so, this explains, in simple terms, why we sin and why we are so miserable.
The main reasons why we experience suffering and why we choose sin are:
- We are suffering the terrible consequences of all our previous sins.
- We are miserable because we are ridden with guilt.
- And because we sin, we feel hollow, like our lives lack authentic meaning and purpose, because we know our course in life ultimately leads to even greater misery and suffering.
- And so we continue to sin because we want and insist on having a quick and easy solution.
The way of sin is a never-ending feedback loop, where sin leads to misery, which leads to more sin, which leads to more misery, and on and on indefinitely.
For such there is little hope in goodness, only the anticipation of a little pleasure or repose in wickedness. And so, the wicked sin, as it were, with a cart rope. (Isaiah 5:18)
It really is that simple. But the solution is equally simple and obvious.
We need to repent as quickly and as thoroughly as possible.
That is our one and only hope!
And so, even if you feel like for you there is no hope, you can still choose repentance anyway. Because hope comes after we have repented, not before.
And so, what is repentance?
Repentance is doing what you sincerely know and believe to be best. It is doing that which brings the best value, the best benefit, and the best outcome. This includes living in harmony with what God has revealed to be just and true.
Or even more simply, repentance is best achieved by strictly following the Light of Christ within you. It is achieved by strictly following your conscience. This is the clearest and easiest path to lasting peace and happiness.
But repentance is and always will be a lot of work! You must search into the light. Learn to divide the light from the darkness, and choose light always in all things.
Repentance requires ever increasing discernment. And increasing discernment is only gained by obedience to the light and laws you have already received.
Make no mistake about it. Repentance requires that you become, increasingly, very strong and very tough. You will encounter testing and resistance from every quarter. You will often be required to stand alone. As others you love oppose you and reject you, you’re only strength, hope, and power will be your solidarity with Christ. But that is also where you will find your greatest joy!
The inevitable result of repentance is joy!
It does not come all at once, but it does come!
Repentance is the most joyous and glorious concept known to man! And it is available to everyone.
As we repent, our guilt is washed away, and we are filled with peace and joy as we experience the love of God in a million ways. This should give us all the reasons we need for repenting.
But let’s face it. Real repentance requires a massive increase in humility and honesty. But as we humbly and honestly face our faults and correct them, we find comfort in the love of God which is overwhelmingly expressed in our hearts as we continuously choose Him. But even then, all kinds of challenges and misery still remain, because not all misery comes from wrongdoing, and not every sorrow comes from our own misdeeds. But what we can change and improve is our own character and decision making. And that is precisely what justice and the law of the gospel demands. It demands actual transformation and change into the image and character of Christ.
Understanding what causes misery and guilt is very instructive in how we must improve and change.
Misery in guilt comes by knowingly violating our conscience by willful disobedience to God, creating a painful division within us. We want peace while continuing to do what causes deep suffering, depression, and conflict within our minds and hearts. We want to feel good about ourselves while making choices we cannot honestly defend. We may offer excuses or seek reassurance from others, but neither can give us the peace that comes from becoming reconciled with truth.
The scriptures explain it this way:
“Therefore, to him that knoweth to do good, and doeth it not, to him it is sin.” (James 4:17)
“For if we sin willfully after that we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remaineth in us [the greater condemnation].” (Hebrews 10:26)
“And that servant, which knew his lord’s will, and prepared not himself, neither did according to his will, shall be beaten with many stripes.” (Luke 12:47)
“But wo unto him that has the law given, yea, that has all the commandments of God, like unto us, and that transgresseth them, and that wasteth the days of his probation, for awful is his state!” (Book of Mormon | 2 Nephi 9:27)
“And now, I say unto you, my brethren, that after ye have known and have been taught all these things, if ye should transgress and go contrary to that which has been spoken, that ye do withdraw yourselves from the Spirit of the Lord, that it may have no place in you to guide you in wisdom’s paths that ye may be blessed, prospered, and preserved—
“I say unto you, that the man that doeth this, the same cometh out in open rebellion against God; therefore he listeth to obey the evil spirit, and becometh an enemy to all righteousness; therefore, the Lord has no place in him, for he dwelleth not in unholy temples.
“Therefore, if that man repenteth not, and remaineth and dieth an enemy to God, the demands of divine justice do awaken his immortal soul to a lively sense of his own guilt, which doth cause him to shrink from the presence of the Lord, and doth fill his breast with guilt, and pain, and anguish, which is like an unquenchable fire, whose flame ascendeth up forever and ever.
“And now I say unto you, that mercy hath no claim on that man; therefore his final doom is to endure a never–ending torment.” (Book of Mormon | Mosiah 2:36 – 39)
When we knowingly sin, we place ourselves on the wrong side of justice.
As we repent, we place ourselves on the winning side of justice.
When we continue to knowingly sin, mercy cannot reach us. Mercy only applies to those who repent.
The power of Christ’s atonement only redeems and exalts those who have faith in Christ, who cease to knowingly sin, who follow Christ’s teachings and example as best they know how.
Repentance opens the way out. Repentance is faith in Christ in action.
In order to repent, we must stop defending what is hurting us. We must acknowledge our wrongdoing, submit to God, make what restitution we can, and begin always choosing that which has the best value, the best benefit, and the best outcome, as best we know how.
Repentance is not perfection. Far from it! It is sincere effort to embrace all truth and goodness in obedience to God, as best we know how. And although we continue to blunder and make mistakes, we are nonetheless honest, obedient, humble, and sincere. And as we become aware of our faults, we do our best to correct them, enduring and receiving all chastening with humility and thankfulness, in an unending best effort to be more closely aligned with Christ.
This requires humility and sometimes considerable discomfort. It often requires sacrifice and pain. Yet the discomfort of honestly confronting our faults and misdeeds leads somewhere that the misery of concealing them never can: toward freedom from sin, reconciliation with God, fulfillment in living a meaningful life, and joy in the knowledge that we are doing everything we can for all our loved ones.
The experience of Alma beautifully illustrates this transformation.
Tormented by the knowledge of his sins, Alma remembered Jesus Christ and cried out for mercy. His account describes a profound change: “And oh, what joy, and what marvelous light I did behold; yea, my soul was filled with joy as exceeding as was my pain!” (Alma 36:20)
The man who had wanted to escape his own existence now experienced a joy equal to the anguish he had suffered. And from that time onward, he did everything he could to love God and others in righteous ways. By this, he began to experience and appreciate the love of God in numerous ways.
But God’s love does not begin when we repent. His love is always there! However, repentance changes how we receive and experience that love. When we resist Him and when we fight against Him, even His invitation to return can feel like an assault and an accusation. As we surrender our excuses and turn toward Him, submitting to Him, receiving the love that He offers, we discover mercy in the place where we previously feared only condemnation. When we become willing to receive the healing He has been offering us through faith on His name, how we perceive Him entirely changes.
When we follow the path of sin, in pride, selfishness, and stubbornness, God’s love often seems harsh, condemning, and even cruel. After all, nobody likes having their faults thrown in their face. Indeed, chastening and admonishment, even when given in the kindest and most loving ways possible, can feel like an attack. Such blessed gifts can feel heartless and cruel. But perception is not the same as reality. The reality is that whom the Lord loves, He chastens. (Hebrews 12:6, Helaman 15:3)
The disposition and nature of God is that He shines the light of truth on all things, including our faults and misdeeds. Why? Because the truth God reveals, if heeded and embraced, frees us from sin and unnecessary suffering. Indeed, ultimately, it fills us with a fullness of joy!
This should give us tremendous motivation to humble ourselves, submit to God, and repent.
We are invited and admonished to lay down the very things that rob us of happiness.
This is not cruelty. This is love!
Whatever pleasure sin offers must be weighed against its cost: the troubled conscience, the damaged relationships, the loss of trust, and the growing distance between the life we live and the life we know He offers those who trust Him enough to repent.
Repentance offers something far more valuable than momentary relief. Repentance offers the possibility of becoming clean, whole, inspired by divine purpose, energized with love, and filled with God’s glory.
We need not wait until we have made ourselves worthy of approaching God. God invites all sinners to turn to Him, to learn of Him, to repent, and to come unto Him in every way. Turning to Him is how the healing begins!
The more fully we repent, the less reason we have to hide, pretend, or flee from our own conscience. In that honesty, repentance, and growth, we experience fulfillment and peace. In reconciliation with God, we discover joy. And as that joy fills us, the sins we once used to escape our misery begin to lose their appeal. In fact, the very thought of them becomes increasingly repulsive and distasteful.
We have every reason to repent, because everything we truly seek—love, peace, freedom, and lasting joy—is found in the life God invites us to receive. Why cling to the very things that deepen our misery when He offers to redeem us, forgive us, heal us, and teach us a better way? We can trust Him enough to confess what we know is wrong, surrender what is harming us, and follow Him into something far better.
As we experience the goodness of His forgiveness and the joy of a conscience at peace, our desire to repent and improve grows. We begin to treasure righteousness because we discover for ourselves how good it is to walk with God. There is literally nothing better than that!
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